I want to find my soulmate on the Internet.

The Internet has some of the most brilliant horny sexless married men one would ever want to meet. Even those married getting sex would do, but I prefer the restless hearts vs. those with simply hot loins to satiate.

Give me the lonely, the depressed, the mixed up, crazy ones who like to watch women pee on themselves or even better, pee on him. I'm restless for a guy who doesn't understand himself or anyone else; who is anti social, constipated, loves enemas and has cavities. How about a guy who thinks he's better off alone, is introverted and is the craziest person he knows?

Yes, we have an awesome group to pick from ladies. Our chances are excellent for finding that one special person to ruin our lives here on the Internet. Forget the real life psycho in the cubicle right next to yours. The Internet is the real, real life.

Come on guys, we can fix you... really :)